VOICES of ALZHEIMER'S
Courage, Humor, Hope, and Love
in the Face of Dementia

by BETSY PETERSON

 
     
 

Excerpt from the Book

 
 

 

 
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From the foreword

What is it like to live with Alzheimer’s? Most of us find it hard to talk about.

This book breaks the silences between those who live with Alzheimer’s—or a similar disease --and those who don’t. We complain that other people don’t understand what Alzheimer’s is like, but how can they understand if we can’t tell them?

There was so much I couldn’t talk about during my husband’s illness, even to those willing to listen. My husband “Pete” was diagnosed with “probable Alzheimer’s” in 1987, and died in 2001.

As Pete’s illness progressed, I felt increasingly lonely, as I was drawn into a separate world that had less and less connection to the other world I lived in. In the familiar, “normal” world, I went to work and did my shopping and chatted with friends and colleagues. But my Alzheimer’s world was one they could barely imagine, even if they knew of Pete’s illness. I didn’t often try to explain it: it was too painful or private, or just made me feel more isolated. For example, a friend might complain that her husband almost forgot their anniversary, but I would not mention that my husband could not tell you the names of his children. I couldn’t share the funny-but-painful moments like the time I found Pete using his toothbrush to brush his hair. It was lonely at home as Pete lost conversational skills, and it was lonely to be living in an Alzheimer’s world so unfamiliar to my friends.

Yet it took me almost seven years to admit that Alzheimer’s is too hard to do alone, and to join the Alzheimer’s community that was waiting to help. For me, as for many, joining a support group made all the difference in the world.

Voices of Alzheimer's is about making connections.

If you are a patient or a family member or a friend, this book can connect you with others facing a similar challenge. It may also help you explain to others what it’s like for you at home. If you work with dementia as part of your job, it may give you a larger sense of the family’s experience. I hope too that this book will help bridge the gaps between those who live with dementia and those who don’t.

Yet this book is more than that. It’s by people who have learned to live with Alzheimer’s, despite the illness --and because of it. It's about coming to terms with the hardships and finding some treasures hidden in this new and different world. It is a book about life itself
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